Relationship

25 Little Sex Mistakes You Don’t Realize You’re Making

You don’t need champagne or satin sheets in order to have a great sex life, but you do need to watch out for these common sex saboteurs.

Thinking you need to do it like they do on ‘Game Of Thrones’

Graceful girl in white tank-top gently kissing her brunette boyfriend hiding behind light curtains. Portait of romantic young couple spending time together on balcony enjoying each other.Look Studio/Shutterstock

Movie sex, like pretty much everything in the movies, is a concoction of fantasy and special effects only loosely tied to reality, yet many people feel that they must be able to have sex “like in the movies,” says Alex Chinks, PsyD, licensed clinical psychologist and clinical sexologist. If you can’t, say, maintain an erection for an hour or achieve a vaginal orgasm it can wreak havoc on your self-esteem and actually make sex harder, she says. “Keep expectations realistic and be open to changing the ‘script,’” Dr. Chinks says. “It’s important to realize that great sex is usually achieved through the simplest acts, and a meaningful connection to one’s partner.” Try these 48 simple ways to improve your sex life.

Being too embarrassed to talk about sex

Funny married couple lying in bed and hiding under white blanket, looking at camera with eyes full of joy. Attractive Caucasian man and woman having fun in bedroom. Love and happiness conceptWAYHOME studio/Shutterstock

File this under funny but true: People are often more comfortable having sex than talking about it, Chinks says. “So many couples are plagued by shame over their sexual preferences and needs, and not feeling as though they can ‘speak up’ to their partners,” she says. “Without good communication, couples often find themselves having sex that feels scripted or repetitive and unsatisfying.” Or not having sex at all. And that would be bad. Because in addition to building intimacy, sex confers a lot of health benefits and even increases longevity. On the flip side, here are 9 things that happen to your body when you stop having sex.

Taking your socks off

Female feet in warm woolen socks around her feet .Part of the body.Beautiful female legs sitting on the bed. Relax concept.iJeab/Shutterstock

Contrary to that image in your mind, socks may actually be the sexiest article of clothing, as wearing them can increase your chance of having an orgasm, according to research done by The University of Groningen. No one is sure exactly why this works but one theory is that in order to orgasm, you need to be totally relaxed and anxiety-free, and cold feet can interfere with the ability to really get into sex, especially for women, says Fran Walfish, PhD, a psychotherapist and author. “Though we usually recommend knocking her socks off, leave them on this time,” she adds.

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